My best day of my life is my 20th birthday. That was last year. Everybody celebrates my yearly birthday. But I think 20th birthday was really special to me. The time, which is 12:00AM, April 19th, of the day, my friends send me a birthday message to me. When I got them, I felt I am a happy person. So, I was so grateful to get the celebration. And in school, my friends gave me a birthday presents and sung a song for me. 20th birthday is the start for my 20 ages. Therefore, I think it is special. I thought it's my best day of my life.
This is pretty good. The basics (topic sentence, supporting sentences, concluding sentence) are all there, but there is one sentence that I think is a little unrelated to the main idea. Can you guess which one it is?
답글삭제Here are a couple tips:
1. To make your writing stronger, try not to use "I think."
2. Check your verbs. Most are correct, but some are in the present tense. They should be in the past tense for this paragraph.
Professor Treeful